My first teacher, Ken Carson (Judo) taught me a very valuable lesson when, after ten years, I moved from Tucson and had to leave my first school. Of all the painful choices I have made in my life, leaving my school was among the top two or three. I wanted to slink away in the night and be on my way. The man of few words could always read my intention. He simply said, “You have to leave correctly.” That story is a different story, but it taught me a very valuable lesson and I have been consistent with it my entire life. It has made a difference for me, especially during times of great transitions. 2018 was a year of big endings. We were closing the Moon on Market Street. CXX was retiring from international teaching. We were going to do it correctly.
I was determined Chen Xiao Xing’s final tour was going down in the Moon’s history as his best yet. The preparations were even more stressful this time because of the seminar’s import. We had t-shirts designed and produced, special laminate promotional signs created, certificates printed. I created a huge photo board of the special moments of the past decade with our teacher, both here and in China. As you can imagine there was also great deal of attendees and with this, lodging and financial organizing. As always, each student stepped up, by now well polished in their roles. In March, CXX arrived in Seattle for his final workshop in Seattle.
I was more exhausted than I had ever been since my immune crash in 2007. In fact, I was beginning to fear for my health. The stress of letting go of the Market Street Dojo and the ambiguity of the future weighed heavily on me. I could not quite get a handle on where to go next, where to replant our Moon. I did doubt myself off and on but still saw no other way out. Ironically our school had never been so strong.
The stress got me during the workshop. I was determined to give it my all, but the first day into it I made a big mistake: I wore shoes I wasn’t used to, shoes with a vibram tread sole. I had moved to the carpet in the lobby for some space to work on the low spinning move in the Laojia Erlu. I was going at it too hard for my level of stress and exhaustion and frankly not paying enough attention to my body. My shoe caught in the carpet, but my spin kept going. I dropped in pain.
My biggest fear was that I had torn my ACL. Fortunately, it was only a torn meniscus, though quite a bad tear. That knee had already taken a hit when the doctor forced it to bend during my immune reaction days, but after so much attention to healing, it had been just fine all these years. Still, the accumulation of everything-my mother’s death, the dojo changes, the workshop, a bad choice on my part and not paying attention – was just too much for my body. Add to that, we had a water pipe break in our home at midnight the next day. Our kitchen flooded, seeping through into the ceiling of the bottom floor where CXX was staying. It was a mess.
Between my knee and the plumbing, I was out of the workshop for a couple of days. When I was there I mostly sat. I remembered the first time CXX taught here, I was also sitting much of the time. Still, it was a spectacular event. In a strange way being on the sidelines gave me a chance to absorb how much my students had grown. They had their own relationships with our grand teacher now and were training plenty hard enough without me. They knew how to run workshops, how to keep the space operational and most importantly to me, how to hold WuDe, Martial Spirit, during extreme and unpredictable times.
After the workshop we began preparations for closing the Moon on Market Street. We were still training hard in our ongoing classes and we were spending extra time rehearsing for what was to be a truly legendary demonstration. I was still trying to get a handle on the “what next” of our situation and considering surgery for my knee. Yet, in what had become the Moon’s way, we all just did it one class at a time. Those last weeks of classes were precious in ways that will always remain deeply infused in my heart. There was so much love and gratitude for who we were and what we did inside of 1716 NW Market Street. We laughed and shed a few tears. We knew our time together there changed and guided our lives in unique and profound ways.
Finally July 23rd arrived. My BFF Allison Helm flew in from San Diego. Mary and Nina both came in from their new homes in Bellingham and California. The place was spick and span. The walls were lined with photo collage posters I created out of hundreds of photos gleaned from the thousands representing our times over the past 15 years. Our demo team, clad in our silks, gathered and did a bit of Qigong to ground. We were ready. When the doors opened, all Moon students and colleagues who could be there, even those from years past, were. There must have been well over 100 people in the dojo that late summer afternoon.
I remembered my first teacher’s lesson of thank you notes. And so, I began by presenting certificates of gratitude I made to all the people who had helped me along the Moon’s way. It took 45 minutes! And then, the demos began.
The demo’s were amazing. Laura, Fiona, Michelle, Lisa, Larry, Cyndi & Dean represented the Luohan with grace and transcendence. Shiuwen, Richard, Doug, Meg, Bob and Wallace represented Chen Taijiquan with power and fluidity. Scooter performed his Fan and Nicholas his mace, both bringing the house down. Joyce, very much at the bedrock of both the Moon & my life and I joined hands for a bit of Tui Shui. Tasara Jen Stone accompanied us with her transcendent music. My good friend of many years, Poet Lucas Smiraldo, created a piece that encapsulated the Moon in a way I didn’t think was possible. You should read it here. I finished with my sword and after just let everyone stand and clap. (Lucas & my demo) And then there was cake! The night went on with lots of hugs, celebrations and tears.
The next week I closed the shop. Many students came by to help me. Joyce, Tasara and I did a ceremony to close the energy of our time there, clearing it for the next renter, whoever that might be. (It actually took almost 2 years to rent it again). As always, Doug Northman helped to the very end. He got up on the ladder, took down the sign and trucked the remainder of the Moon into storage. I hired a team to clean the place top to bottom, especially that floor. The landlord, still remorseful about his error and losing our group, came by to do the inspection. He said, “I knew you would leave it like this.”
I left the next week for two months of overseas travel. I spent several days in Berlin in the museums and city, then back to Slovenia for CXX’s formal retirement seminar, with Moons Richard and Bob joining. Others from the states came and we saw our training pals from all over the U.K. and Europe. We trained hard and gave CXX a great send off. Kathy from Portland & I then spent a few days in Amsterdam wandering the museums and canals. After a brief re-tooling back in Seattle, I travelled through three typhoons (and that is story!) back to Japan, a place I love and had lived in from ’92-93. I messed around in Kyoto for a few days and then proceeded to the Kii Penninsula where I hiked in the pouring rain for 11 days along the ancient, sacred Kumano Kodo pilgrimage route. At Hongu temple, I turned 61.
Well dear readers, this now will bring us to the last story of the past 25 years, which I will tell tomorrow, May 25th
